The Ritual

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The night seemed to sound only of water
thought her wearied soul and mind,
inclined towards the sky that had darkened
to a faint violet–inviolate as though free
from desecration and blind rage.

Age, she thought was like climbing a summit,
the further we climb the clearer our views get.
Forget the one who hurt you yesterday
because lives fade like a passing shadow.

Espresso and a half-written page peered
 as a tear blossomed in her eye.
 Why was her heart bent upon following a
 ritual where each stretch of the imagination
 was tortured. Orchard, which had once
 belonged to my mother was mine--
Dine.

 

Photo credits: Pixabay

Form: Chained Rhyme

Posted on Sunday Mini-Challenge @ Real Toads

& Posted on the ‘Poetry Pantry’ @ Poets United

Comments

  1. Bjorn says:

    Age is like climbing a summit… I like that… the wider we see (but the further we fall)

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Bjorn ๐Ÿ™‚ so glad you liked it โค

  2. Love that second stanza Sanaa! So beautiful and so very true!!

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Carrie ๐Ÿ˜€ so glad you enjoyed it โค

  3. Kerry O'Connor says:

    This is very introspective, the thoughts and the rhymes work well together.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Kerry ๐Ÿ˜€ so good to see you โค

  4. I like the play on words in:
    ‘…a faint violetโ€“inviolate as though free
    from desecration and blind rage’
    and the idea that age is like climbing a summit:
    ‘the further we climb the clearer our views get’.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Kim ๐Ÿ˜€ so glad you liked it โค

  5. Old Egg says:

    I loved how you worked the required rhyming pattern Sanaa, and how well the narrator’s feelings are conveyed in the poem.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Robin ๐Ÿ˜€ so good to see you โค

  6. Jae Rose says:

    A wonderful meditation on age and writing

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Jae ๐Ÿ™‚ so glad you liked it โค

  7. Rommy says:

    We live, we learn. Sometimes that learning is touched by sadness, but sadness has its own lessons to teach too.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Definitely ๐Ÿ˜Š thanks for stopping by, Rommy โค

  8. Marian says:

    Whoosh! I like this, too. The rhymes and lines are so subtle that I had to work to find the chain, a good thing! I particularly love shadow/espresso and tortured orchard! ๐Ÿ™‚ And the second paragraph, I can relate. Really nice, Sanaa.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Aww gosh!โค Thank you so much, Marian ๐Ÿ˜Š so glad you enjoyed it!โค

      (and thank you for the lovely prompt)

  9. Mary says:

    ” Age, she thought was like climbing a summit,
    the further we climb the clearer our views get.
    Forget the one who hurt you yesterday
    because lives fade like a passing shadow. ”

    Those are among my favorite words of yours written, Sanaa.
    I think you have expressed this concept so very well. And we do
    have to forget those who hurt us in the past….and move on!

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Mary ๐Ÿ˜Š so glad you liked it โค

  10. Magical Mystical Teacher says:

    I’m climbing the summit of which you speak in your poem: age, old age. Ah…

    1. Sanaa says:

      โคโคโค

  11. I love “Age, she thought was like climbing a summit,
    the further we climb the clearer our views get.” So true.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Sherry ๐Ÿ˜€ so glad you liked it โค

  12. Bev says:

    “Lives fade like a passing shadow” … love that phrase!

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Beverly ๐Ÿ™‚ so good to see you โค

  13. Anna :o] says:

    Age is like climbing a summit – I’m not quite sure I want to reach it…Anna :o]

    1. Sanaa says:

      ๐Ÿ˜‰

  14. Elizabeth says:

    I agree that the higher we climb, the clearer the view. But, age also allows us to stop and rest more, which also allows for a wider perspective,

    Elizabeth

    1. Sanaa says:

      Definitely ๐Ÿ™‚ thanks for stopping by, Elizabeth โค

  15. Lovely. Your poems are always rich with imagery and emotion. ๐Ÿ˜Š

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Loredana ๐Ÿ˜€ so good to see you โค

  16. Truedessa says:

    Forget the one who hurt you yesterday
    because lives fade like a passing shadow.

    These lines are a reminder that life is short and we cannot change yesterday.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Definitely ๐Ÿ™‚ thanks for stopping by, Truedessa โค

  17. The first stanza is lovely in its ambiguity and richness, especially the ending lines. The implications of the “as if”, which does’t tell us directly that the sky has been desecrated, but still leaves us thinking maybe… but hopefully, not.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Aww gosh!โค Thank you so much, Magaly ๐Ÿ˜€ so glad you enjoyed it!โค

  18. Paul says:

    I tend to find the further I climb the more knackered I get ๐Ÿ˜‰

    1. Sanaa says:

      ๐Ÿ˜‰

  19. Audrey says:

    Beautiful, especially the second stanza–the introspection feels so natural here–

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Audrey ๐Ÿ˜€ so glad you liked it โค

  20. Sara says:

    Age depicted beautifully in your comparison to climbing a summit. Lovely poem.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Sara ๐Ÿ˜€ so glad you liked it โค

  21. Wendy Bourke says:

    Another beautiful piece, The second stanza, in particular, I found to be utterly transcendent, Sanaa. So insightful … brilliant, really.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Wendy ๐Ÿ˜€ so glad you liked it โค

  22. J Cosmo Newbery says:

    “Age, she thought was like climbing a summit” – I think I’m picking up speed down the other side. ๐Ÿ™

    1. Sanaa says:

      ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

  23. Chris Evans says:

    “Forget the one who hurt you yesterday” ..this is so wonderfully wise ๐Ÿ˜Š Often it is that our entire life is wasted brooding upon past relationships and woes.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Definitely ๐Ÿ™‚ thanks for stopping by, Chris โค

  24. Jane Seymour says:

    “inviolate as though free from desecration and blind rage” ..that is beyond beautiful, girl!๐Ÿ’–

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Jane ๐Ÿ˜€ so glad you liked it โค

  25. dsnake1 says:

    elegantly done! so many lovely lines in the poem.
    i like what you said about age is like climbing a summit.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, dsnake ๐Ÿ˜€ so good to see you โค

  26. I think you are right, with age, the view is no more true, but it is clearer.

    1. Sanaa says:

      โค

  27. Jim says:

    Nice, but almost heart-breaking to me, Sanaa. I think she found that “(some)lives (don’t) fade like a passing shadow.” I have several that didn’t, I started writing a blog memoir about them but put it on hold long ago. It is at
    http://jimmielife1.blogspot.com/
    ..

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Jim โ˜บ๏ธ so glad you liked it โค๏ธ

  28. What an arresting first line! And then you build on it to create this intriguing picture and story. Beautiful use of language, as always.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Aww goshโค๏ธ Thank you so much, Rosemaryโ˜บ๏ธ so glad you enjoyed itโค๏ธ

  29. lovely. I love that line “because lives fade like a passing shadow.”

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, MNL ๐Ÿ™‚ so glad you liked it โค

  30. gillena says:

    “Age, she thought was like climbing a summit,
    the further we climb the clearer our views get.”

    If so, then i’m ready to climb even higher

    much love…

    1. Sanaa says:

      Definitely ๐Ÿ™‚ thanks for stopping by, Gillena โค

      much love…

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