Airless and unloved, in the dank basement of the mind is past
personified;
its slender hands stretching out like those of a clock,
is it such a sin to relive the minutes, the hours?
Ice melts to reveal what once had lain beneath;
acres of muddy fields,
their steady heartbeat awaiting first light, similar to when rosebud
sprouts endings
into bloom inside— neither can we breathe nor can we hope to achieve
sweet slumber,
the past is a shadow that lingers,
that follows into days that reflect a future existence;
I throw a handful of untidy words into the open, taste coffee
in my mouth long after the day is over
and watch
as they land, eloquent, because of the seeds sown; the present is a harsh
but wonderful lesson.
There are things we can discover about ourselves if we step into the light,
it’s just a blockage of a kind; it’s just a blockage of a kind.
Photo credits: Winter Color #2 by Trisha Adams oil 11×14, Pinterest
Inspired by “Airless and unloved, in the dank basement of the mind.”
– L Igloria ~ A Reparation.
Laura hosts at dVerse and invites us to consider and write about
endings and offers some final lines. Come join us! 💝
Posted for Poetics: Beginning at the End @ dVerse Poets Pub
Wow! This line sets the standard for the rest of the poem, Sanaa: ‘Airless and unloved, in the dank basement of the mind is past personified’, which makes me wonder what happened in the past. I love the simile ‘its slender hands stretching out like those of a clock’, and then the carefree way the speaker throws ’a handful of untidy words into the open’ reassures me that the past is long gone, and she has stepped into the light and overcome the blockage.
Yayyy! Thank you so much, Kim 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you! 💄❤️
I love how you used the first line… really, the connection to the past and how I can see how this can happen. I had orignally thought about using that line, but I missed Laura’s instruction of not reading the poem before so I changed my mind.
Thank you so much, Bjorn 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
I love that use of repetition at the end, Sanaa. It gives the poem such a reflective feel – it’s very effective. Lots to love here.
Thank you so much, Sarah 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
You toss past present and future together, and end up with a positive after starting with a negative. Nicely done.
Thank you so much, Jane 😀 so good to see you 💄❤️
Such wise words, especially:
‘the present is a harsh
but wonderful lesson.’
I enjoyed the flow of your words and your interpretation of the prompt here, Sanaa.
Thank you so much, Ingrid 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
Wonderful throughout, and I especially got whammed by your closing repetition. Well done Sanaa.
Thank you so much, Ron 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
This is such a powerful write! These words “the past is a shadow that lingers,” especially strike me.
And these
“I throw a handful of untidy words into the open, taste coffee
in my mouth long after the day is over
and watch
as they land, eloquent, because of the seeds sown; the present is a harsh
but wonderful lesson.
There are things we can discover about ourselves if we step into the light,
it’s just a blockage of a kind; it’s just a blockage of a kind.”
Mixing the mundane, coffee, with “eloquent” and “seeds sown” and a “wonderful lesson”.
I really was moved by this post.
Thank you so much, Lillian 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
I really like where you took this prompt. This is one of those pieces that’s going to stick for a while. I especially like, “its slender hands stretching out like those of a clock,” and the repetition in the last line. Nicely done!
Thank you so much, Susan 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
Wonderful writing Sanaa! I really loved these lines…
I throw a handful of untidy words into the open, taste coffee
in my mouth long after the day is over
and watch
as they land, eloquent, because of the seeds sown
Thank you so much, Dwight 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
“the past is a shadow that lingers,”
This is a stunning write all around. The opening sets the tone. I am all in from it, but I just know the above is the line that will haunt me. I walked away and came back and I’m still in its grip. Bravo!
Thank you so much, Raivenne 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
I think I enjoyed this line break more than any other I have recently read – well done, Sanaa!
<3
David
Thank you so much, David 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
I like “the past is a shadow that lingers.”
Also, I like the ending very much.
Overall, the poem is very rich, textured,
and appears to have a reflective tone.
Thank you so much, Tzvi 🙂 so good to see you 💄❤️
“a handful of untidy words” in your hands are wondrously expressive of the confining past, and the haunting ending is visceral.
Thank you so much, Dora 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
That last line is very clever. A blockage that, by its very nature, repeats.
Thank you so much, Misky 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
There are things we can discover
about ourselves, if we step into the light,
Precious moments left at the wayside if we are careless of the strength and talents inherited. Good reminder Sanaa to be alert of God-given gifts not maximized.
Hank
Definitely 🙂 thanks for stopping by, Bjorn 💄❤️
Wow Sanaa,
Powerful words! I relate in so many ways. I love “I throw a handful of untidy words into the open, taste coffee
in my mouth long after the day is over
and watch
as they land, eloquent, because of the seeds sown; the present is a harsh
but wonderful lesson.”
Thank you so much, Mary 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
This is beautiful and the repetition at the end marvelous!
Thank you so much, Helen 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️