On the threshold of desire

Spread the love

Beneath dimly lit obsidian sky
Whisper my name
Hear the wind sing softly into your ear
Address your mind
Tonight I wish to peruse and embrace
With new delight
Oh corners of your luscious brooding lips
I long to cite
There’s theory about you yet to be proved
And brought to light
Love, whenever inspiration runs dry
I turn to you
I’d never stop for moment to appraise
Were it not for subtle hint in your gaze

I picture you beneath stars in silence
And find myself
Wanting you in ways indescribable
Truly, madly
I taste longing and hold it in my mouth
You’re the cause
There’s no denying when its plain desire
Its fervent laws
Determined I let out sigh in the dark
Oh briefest pause
You and I’ll be dangerously aligned
No matter what
At last the hour comes melding night and dawn
The spell is broken and feeling is gone.

 

Photo credits: Pinterest 

Form: Cavatina

Posted on Sunday Mini-Challenge @ Real Toads

& Posted on the poetry pantry @ Poets United 

Comments

  1. Marian says:

    Your take on the form is so interesting, Sanaa! I really like it, kind of becomes epic, and full of desire. Nice.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Marian 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

      (and thank you for the lovely prompt)

  2. Romantic and dreamy, Sanaa. I like the rhymes and the emotion in the lines:
    ‘I taste longing and hold it in my mouth
    You’re the cause
    There’s no denying when its plain desire
    Its fervent laws’
    and the rhyming couplet:
    ‘At last the hour comes melding night and dawn
    The spell is broken and feeling is gone’.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Kim 😀 so glad you enjoyed it ❤️

  3. Toni Spencer says:

    Interesting, sort if form. I am not seeing your rhyming lines though?

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Toni 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

  4. You have managed the form so well, Sanaa. I especially like the resolution in the closing lines.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Sherry 😀 so good to see you ❤️

  5. kaykuala says:

    At last the hour comes melding night and dawn
    The spell is broken and feeling is gone.

    What a relief! Persistence works obviously, Sanaa!

    Hank

    1. Sanaa says:

      Definitely 😀 thanks for stopping by, Hank ❤️

  6. Sumana Roy says:

    “I taste longing and hold it in my mouth” What more could be said of desire or love? Beautiful, Sanaa.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Sumana 😀 so good to see you ❤️

  7. HA says:

    Ah, so sensuous and delectable — I love the cadence and vibrations through the lines; it’s so evocative.
    A lovely rhythm. Also, the indescribable melancholy of separation and the end of that fleeting experience/emotion is well expressed in that ending couplet.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Anmol 😀 so glad you enjoyed it ❤️

  8. Jae Rose says:

    Wonderfully intense. You capture the moment of love and loss perfectly

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Jae 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

  9. Old Egg says:

    How could you lose that feeling at dawn Sanaa? What a beautiful read and I especially like the “subtle hint in your gaze”. I do love your romantic verse..

    1. Sanaa says:

      Lol just for variation, Robin 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

  10. Kerry says:

    This is an interesting form for narrative poetry. I like the way you worked with it.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Kerry 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

  11. Mary says:

    Such a romantic poem, Sanaa, but then in the end it seems like the feeling is gone when dawn comes. So it all seems a dream, but beautiful while it lasted.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Mary 😀 so good to see you ❤️

  12. Rommy says:

    Ah youth and the intensity that they bring to all things, even if it turns out only to be a one night stand. It does sound like a hell of a night though.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Definitely 😀 thanks for stopping by, Rommy ❤️

  13. Jim Tee says:

    this was a beautiful love letter to your beloved. it was so passionately written. great write!

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Jim 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

  14. sensual, playful and teasing – especially like
    “Address your mind
    Tonight I wish to peruse and embrace
    With new delight”

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Laura 😀 so glad you enjoyed it ❤️

  15. annell4 says:

    No, feelings like that don’t last long, yet might return without warning.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Definitely 🙂 thanks for stopping by, Annell ❤️

  16. I love the motif and its implication, the joy of knowing that a poet can always find inspiration in a particular person, thing, feeling… even when the muse is feeling feisty. Yummy.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Aww gosh! ❤️ Thank you so much, Magaly 😍 so glad you enjoyed it! ❤️

  17. Beautifully passionate!

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Rosemary 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

  18. So Intense and beautiful 🙂

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Purba 😀 so good to see you ❤️

  19. Chrissa says:

    Dangerous alignments…love that phrase and the way the entire poem seems to shift and move. 🙂

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Chrissa 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

  20. Jim says:

    Sanaa, I feel for the writer upon reading those last two lines. Two thoughts came to mind , first being “‘the end of a one night stand.” The other is that of a budding romance showing personal restraint, and “what next, will these feelings return?”
    A nice write, it held my attention well. Thank you.
    ..

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Jim 🙂 so good to see you ❤️

  21. Sara McNulty says:

    Passionate scarlet becomes a pale watercolor in the dawn. Great while it lasts! Love this, Sanaa.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Sara 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

  22. Wendy Bourke says:

    The word-weaving in this is stunning. A joy to read!

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Wendy 😀 so glad you enjoyed it ❤️

  23. Amara says:

    This is wonderfully passionate! Love the rhyming and emotions in these lines: ‘I taste longing and hold it in my mouth. You’re the cause. There’s no denying when its plain desire. Its fervent laws’

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Amara 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

  24. dsnake1 says:

    how well you captured love and loss.
    an interesting form. the rhymes work very well. 🙂

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Lee San 😀 so good to see you ❤️

  25. Cressida says:

    Marvellous poem. Cavatina suits you.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Cressida 😀 so glad you liked it ❤️

  26. Vivian Zems says:

    I always adore your love poems- sublime!

    1. Sanaa says:

      Thank you so much, Vivian 😀 so good to see you ❤️

  27. Margaret says:

    … and in the morning it all looks and feels differently. It builds up with high expectations… but alas.

    1. Sanaa says:

      Alas indeed.. sigh..❤️ thanks for stopping by, Margaret 😀

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