Read this one slowly;
tranquil on the water scene,
reeds and pond bulrushes,
feelings washed— the black sky
sweeping down echoes what is left.
Photo credits: Marta Bevacqua, Drifting down to the ground
Grace hosts at dVerse and invites us to try a new poetic form
known as “The Wayra.” Come join us! 💝
Posted for Poetry Form: Wayra @dVerse Poets Pub
40 Responses
I like the ending a lot… the end with those echoes being what is left… just like November… I think we had the same perspective in our poems.
We most certainly did! Thank you so much, Bjorn 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
I read this slowly and felt the emotional ebbing underneath. That black sky with echoes of what is left is heavy with symbolism.
Thank you so much, Grace 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
(and thank you for the glorious prompt) 🌹
That echo resonates, Sanaa! So much feeling in this. (Of course.) 😀❤️
Thank you so much, Merril 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
Dark and delicious, winter as a wench, her tresses a trap, her embrace lethal, and November is a hostess, seducing us with a smile that hides the fangs to come.
Thank you so much, Glenn 😀 so glad you enjoyed it! Winter’s embrace is undoubtedly lethal 💄❤️
a gentle journey into the obliteration of winter … nicely done!
Thank you so much, Kate 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
I love the last line…and I read it slowly.
Thank you so much, Mary 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
Leads up to the powerful ending that hoes deeper after the first read — very powerful indeed..
Thank you so much, Ain 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
The black sky sweeping down…Perfect imagery, SR.
Thank you so much, Ron 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
Sanaa,
I read it slowly and again and again. Just too good, the Ophelia-like voice and despond.
pax,
dora
Thank you so much, Dora 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
I really like the way the opening line sets the stage for the mystery to come.
Thank you so much, Alicia 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
The last line was so poignant Sanaa. Beautifully done ☺️💕
Thank you so much, Christine 😀 so good to see you 💄❤️
The poem seems to pivot (for me) on the word ‘black’. I enjoyed this one.
Thank you so much, Jane 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
read this second time and the effect you made from the first to the last lines are just breathtaking. a great nod to the form, Sanaa!
Thank you so much, Rosemarie 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
Felt a slow sinking into the winter ahead – so beautifully written.
Thank you so much, Marion 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
I like the instructional opening line – a quirky nod to the mood. Creates pace, in a short piece. Also, I love the idea of echos sweeping down. Wonderful.
Thank you so much, Darius 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
Love the stillness of the opening lines and then the dark sky sweeping down! 💞💞
Thank you so much, Punam 😀 so good to see you 💄❤️
I like especially the image of the black sky sweeping the water.
Thank you so much, Kerfe 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
Tha end image draws us in to all the feelings expressed before.
Much💛love
Thank you so much, Gillena 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
Much love back ..
What a great opening line … I could feel my heart rate slowing!!!! Cheers, Sanaa.
Thank you so much, Helen 😀 so glad you enjoyed it! Cheers 💄❤️
Excellent use of the form, Sanaa, haunting and mysterious..JIM
Thank you so much, Jim 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️