The coffee shop floats a little,
unmoored
from the street, steam lifts
from cups
like thoughts considering escape.
A man at the window observes his reflection
arrive
a second late.
Outside, the light looks
tired,
already rehearsing dusk.
Spoons clink—small, precise
sounds— then vanish
into their proper silences,
the air smells
faintly of bitterness trying to pass
for warmth.
I hold my cup too long.
The heat insists.
Behind the counter,
a clock
ticks without confidence.
Nothing here is wrong, exactly.
Still, when the door
opens,
everyone looks up— as if waiting
for proof
that the world
has not quietly detached.
Photo credits: Pinterest
Dora hosts at dVerse where she invites us to dip our word-brush into Elizabeth Bishop’s
poetic inkpot. Come join us 💛
Posted for Poetics: Borrowing Bishop @dVerse Poets Pub
27 Responses
Vivid and oh so atmospheric, Sanaa! I was so immersed in the cafe’s ambiance, its little details, I didn’t realize I too was waiting for … something, like its occupants. I especially like,
“A man at the window observes his reflection
arrive
a second late.”
and
“Spoons clink—small, precise
sounds— then vanish
into their proper silences,”
Thank you so much, Dora 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
(and thank you for the lovely prompt) 🥂
such a clever opening – mirroring coffee floats and rooting it at the end with the open door to the world outside – loved this poem Sanaa
Thank you so much, Laura 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
A beautiful descriptive verse where details make the story…
Thank you so much, Ain 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
I love how you took an everyday event and turned into an exceptional experience, Sanaa. The opening lines are so evocative and mysterious, with the coffee shop ‘unmoored from the street’ and the steam lifting…like thoughts considering escape’. Your poem also appeals to the senses, with the clink of spoons and the air smelling ‘faintly of bitterness trying to pass for warmth’. A wonderful piece.
Thank you so much, Kim 😍 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
A wonderful ride through your thoughts at the coffee shoppe! Your detail in the poem is so very well done!
Thank you so much, Dwight 😀 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
beautiful rendering of a few moments in a life. ordinary but extraordinary as you have fashioned it
love this:
“the air smells
faintly of bitterness trying to pass
for warmth.”
Thank you so much, Lisa 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
I love the line that the clock ticks without confidence…the sense of waiting for something comes across quite strongly in the imagery.
Thank you so much, Di 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
What beautiful imagery and story-telling – you really transported is there and there was a definite sense of a familiar kind of mystery! Jae
Thank you so much, Jae 😀 so glad the poem spoke to you 💄❤️
Well done. You mastered this prompt!!!!
Thank you so much, Judy 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
I get that feeling, especially in foggy evenings.
Thank you so much, Jay 🙂 so glad the poem resonated with you 💄❤️
A slice of the profane world, in the sense that lack of mystery and all that goes with it is mysterious. Instead of an invitation a slight chill push.
Thank you so much, Brendan 😀 so glad the poem spoke to you 💄❤️
You may not have noticed, but I was in the coffee shop with you … a few tables away. You painted the scene with words, beautifully.
Aww gosh! Thank you so much, Helen 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
Hi Sanaa, I really enjoyed this poem. It is beautifully descriptive.
I love this poem, Sanaa, so many small on point descriptions, “already rehearsing dusk.” , “smells faintly of bitterness trying to pass for warmth.” and “a clock ticks without confidence.” Superb!
This is brilliant, Sanaa! Descriptions and thoughts float about in such a pleasing way.