Early in the morning I woke, barefoot, dabbling like an artist in the dewy and crumbling sand, but later in the day the sun warms my feet.
The conversation I hear stimulates the mind, suggests new topics and calls forth expression of my own thoughts. It is an amazing thing that leads one to understand candy dreams, and to begin to see clearly why the past has to die.
Is it possible that shows, and toys were all primitive, and would be utterly despised by the young folk now – full of anticipation, I walk by a cheap hotel and observe the view from its windows.
The light is dim but flickers against the ceiling, there are groceries on the counter, carrying stories, and a coffee machine. The dusty leaves of the trees rustling on the boulevard snap me out of my reverie. A lady, looking down, smiles. Maybe she knows.
She will have to excuse my impertinence, I thought. And so, around these images, two beds, a half-eaten croissant and a pounding pulse, I figured I will have to go home.
Morning’s breath whispers,
fog drapes the world in shadows,
lost dreams linger soft.
Photo credits: Room for tourists by Edward Hopper, wikiart.org
Lisa hosts at dVerse and invites us to write a burning haibun. I was inspired
by the song “Two beds and a coffee machine,” by Savage Garden 🩷
An excerpt from the song “Two beds and a coffee machine”
by Savage Garden
But the mind is an amazing thing,
full of candy dreams and new toys
and another cheap hotel,
two beds and a coffee machine
but there are groceries to buy
and she knows she’ll have to go home.
Posted for Haibun Monday – Making Way @dVerse Poets Pub
32 Responses
I love the title, Sanaa, and where the song lyrics took you. I love the idea of ‘dabbling like an artist in the dewy and crumbling sand’, and the detail in ‘The light is dim but flickers against the ceiling, there are groceries on the counter, carrying stories, and a coffee machine.’ I also love how the ‘fog drapes the world in shadows’.
Thank you so much, Kim 😍 so glad the haibun resonated with you 💄❤️
Sanaa, I like how she tiptoes through nature and happens into voyeurism. I like how the scene turns into a shared experience. Excellent starting with a seed that grew into a beautiful flower.
Thank you so much, Lisa 😀 so glad you enjoyed the haibun 💄❤️
Very nicely done, Sanaa. I like what you have done with this one.
Thank you so much, Dwight 😀 so glad the haibun resonated with you 💄❤️
What an amazing burning haibun, Sanaa! I love it!
Awww gosh! Thank you so much, Dora 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
So fresh and alive…’the past has to die’…the brilliance of that line!
Technically really well done, but one takes away the mood, and feeling created first.
Thank you so much, Ain 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
Nice one Sanaa. Happy New Year
Much♡love
Happy New Year, Gillena ❤️❤️
As AIn says, it is the mood that works best, both in you and in that lady which almost works as a mirror image.
Thank you so much, Bjorn 😀 so glad the haibun resonated with you 💄❤️
I too loved this line: barefoot, dabbling like an artist in the dewy and crumbling sand,
And I love the haiku, just beautiful.
Thank you so much, Di 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
Beautifully written, Sanaa! I love how you used lyrics from a song to create your haibun.
Yvette M Calleiro 🙂
http://yvettemcalleiro.blogspot.com
Thank you so much, Yvette 😀 so glad the haibun and its imagery appealed to you 💄❤️
So beautifully done, Sanaa! Brilliant use of the song. Love it. 💖💖
Thank you so much, Punam 😀 so glad you liked it 💄❤️
you pulled me right in with your first line
Thank you so much, Rog 😀 so good to see you 💄❤️
I enjoyed your observations from start to finish, a beautifully composed burning haibun, Sanaa. Wishing you a wonderful 2025.
Thank you so much, Helen 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
This is wonderful! I love that you went with song lyrics for your burning haibun and love the song you chose. There’s so much to discover in your haibun.
Thank you so much, Chris 😀 so glad the haibun resonated with you 💄❤️
Sanaa, I love how the image, your haibun, and the song excerpt meld together!
Thank you so much, Nolcha 😀 so good to see you 💄❤️
Which of us has not “dabbl[ed] like an artist in the dewy and crumbling sand” Sanaa but you are the one who captures that in words – and the rest – such beauty in small observations… 💜
Thank you so much, Andrew 😀 so glad you enjoyed it 💄❤️
Ah, great song to lend itself. Love this Haibun Sanaa, for me quite dreamlike and also raises questions.
Thank you so much, Paul 😀 so glad the haibun resonated with you 💄❤️