
Wisps of silver grey smoke curl
and dance
their way through the room
as though anxious to escape the mouths
of perpetratorsβ is this what it means to abide by?
Sickly sweet,
I attempt to billow in dense clouds of conversation
in the hallway.
Photo credits: Fabian Perez Painting, Pinterest
Lisa is our hostess today at dVerse and the word is “abide.”
Come join us! π
Posted for Quadrille #117 @ dVerse Poets Pub
I love the way you played with the smoke and cloud imagery, Sanaa, starting with wisps and ending with dense clouds.
Thank you so much, Kim π so glad you liked it πβ€οΈ
Yes, that was skillful!
β€οΈβ€οΈβ€οΈ
I can almost feel the smoke and clouds… there are places where the atmosphere feels too dense… maybe the hallway is better
Thank you so much, Bjorn π so glad the poem resonated with you πβ€οΈ
a delight to read and so playful too
“I attempt to billow in dense clouds of conversation”
Thank you so much, Laura π so glad you enjoyed it πβ€οΈ
Really atmospheric, Sanaa – ‘billow in dense clouds of conversation’ is just wonderful!
Thank you so much, Ingrid π so good to see you πβ€οΈ
The smoke comes alive in the room and by the end has dominated those in it. I don’t blame her a bit for getting out of there! Nice creation of atmosphere, Sanaa! I wondered if anyone would write to the unbearable definition of abide π
Thank you so much, Lisa π so glad the poem resonated with you πβ€οΈ
(and thank you for the glorious prompt) πΉ
Very atmospheric. My eyes are burning from the smoke. I think she’s wise to go out to the hallway. π
Thank you so much, Merril π so glad you liked it πβ€οΈ
As a lifetime non-smoker, I applaud your message and the clever rocking of the prompt. I, too, used that definition of “abide”.
Thank you so much, Glenn π so glad you enjoyed it πβ€οΈ
Delightful description of a gathering of smokers!
β€οΈβ€οΈβ€οΈ
For some reason this reminds me of student parties. Billowing our way through the smoke.
Thank you so much, Jane π so glad the poem resonated with you πβ€οΈ
I like your semantic field here – wisp, smoke, billow, cloud – works so well.
Thank you so much, Sarah π so glad you liked it πβ€οΈ
Wonder wisp of a poem!
Thank you so much, Philip π so good to see you πβ€οΈ
In the hallway , yes for sure, One needs to remove oneself from sickly billows
Happy Monday Sanaa
Muchπlove
Definitely π thanks for stopping by, Gillena πβ€οΈ
Happy Monday to you too
Much love …
Wonderfully smoky imagery, Sanaa. Quarilliffic.
Thank you so much, Ron π so glad you enjoyed it πβ€οΈ
This made an icy – get out of here – thrill run down my back, the image is so vivid! π
Thank you so much, Red Cat π so glad the poem resonated with you πβ€οΈ
Excellent imagery. I could see the smoke in the room!
Thank you so much, Colleen π so glad you liked it πβ€οΈ
Very evocative. Good writing. You really took me there & I couldn’t wait to leave! π
β€οΈβ€οΈβ€οΈ
Food for thought. I can almost taste the words.
Thank you so much, Kerfe π so good to see you πβ€οΈ
in dense clouds of conversation
in the hallway.
Certainly Sanaa, a better location as an alternative!
Hank
Definitely π thanks for stopping by, Hank! πβ€οΈ
Beautiful Sanaa. Smoke does really abide for a long time in a room. It floats like a ghost and penetrates clothes leaving a lasting legacy!!
Thank you so much, Dwight π so glad the poem resonated with you πβ€οΈ
Strong imagery with subtle use of the word “abide”…well writ!
Thank you so much, Lynn π so glad you liked it πβ€οΈ
I love, love, love the wordplay in here and the imagery, it’s so vivid, visual. Excellent writing.
Thank you so much, Lucy π so glad you enjoyed it πβ€οΈ
great imagery, feels intense … well provoked!
β€οΈβ€οΈβ€οΈ
Fantastic — a great story in so few words.
Thank you so much, Francis π so good to see you πβ€οΈ
βI attempt to billow in dense clouds of conversationβ fits perfectly. It completes the picture.
Thank you so much, Ken π so glad you liked it πβ€οΈ
Sanaa, what a potent evocation, right to the bone.
Thank you so much, Paul π so glad the poem resonated with you πβ€οΈ
I like the atmosphere youβve created.
Thank you so much, Candy π so good to see you πβ€οΈ
So finely crafted, it’s almost possible to imagine the persona billowing through “dense clouds of conversation.” Maybe because we’ve all been there! π
Thank you so much, Dora π so glad you enjoyed it πβ€οΈ
Good for you for responding first to dversepoetry with your Quadrille using “Abide” in the poem. You did it masterfully!
Thank you so much, Jan π so glad you liked it πβ€οΈ
This is so vivid, Sanaa. You’ve created quite an atmosphere here. Well done.
Thank you so much, De π so glad the poem resonated with you πβ€οΈ