Unraveling the pattern of pretense

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Lately it seems as though
sighs are dew which have
turned to frost–

Why do I bear this burden
oh why does dawn bleed
red and shout?

As waves that lend chorus
of voices is pretense, come
adorn me with tears, come
wound with shallowness
of heart–

To the incessant calling of
sorrow you plead deaf, I’d
rather you didn’t hide
behind smiles while you
pity and change,

you termed me as foolish
while I identified you as
strange.

 

Photo credits: Pinterest

Posted on ‘Open Link Night’ @ dVerse Pub

Posted on ‘Poetry Pantry’ @ Poets United

90 thoughts on “Unraveling the pattern of pretense

  1. Bjorn says:

    A well deserved scorn in the end… those insensitive smiles do not deserve to be treated as anything else than strange.

  2. Lona Gynt says:

    Interesting subject. It is my sense that pretensiousness is usually treated satirically or ironically as A characteristic of individuals either callous or unaware and thus somewhat outside the bounds of serious literary contemplation, which prompts me to reflect your question back:
    “Why do you bear this burden?” You answer subtly and beautifully that the poet longs to be understood and acknowledged by the loved one, and the fact that this is not done and such desires labeled as foolishness hurts , and frames the “strangeness” vs intimacy vis a vis. Well done, resonant.

  3. Jane Seymour says:

    There is an unmistakable hint of agony and pain in “Oh why does dawn bleed red and shout?” A powerful and poignant write!

  4. Sameera Chaudhary says:

    “As waves that lend chorus of voices is pretense” .. sigh this is such a potent and apt description! 💙

  5. Bryan McClellan says:

    “To the incessant calling of
    sorrow you plead deaf, I’d
    rather you didn’t hide
    behind smiles while you
    pity and change,”

    This line struck me hard. I feel guilty of ‘pleading deaf’ myself. I wonder if you would further expand this idea for me, either here or in another poem?

  6. Old Egg says:

    Your opening stanza really shone for me. Setting the scene for the denouement in the following verses as their relationship is shattered. What a brilliant write Sanaa..

  7. gillena says:

    I like the duality of the process. It does go both ways doesn’t it?

    “You termed me as foolish
    while I identified you as
    strange”

    Much♥️love

  8. Mary says:

    Makes me wonder why these two have a relationship if they think one another either ‘foolish’ or ‘strange.’

  9. Magical Mystical Teacher says:

    I hate it when people pretend that they don’t hear me, even when I shout. That’s one element of this poem that resonates with me.

  10. Myrna says:

    I like the imagery here. Also I sense the narrator would like to describe the pretentious person as more than strange but just left it that.

  11. Anna :o] says:

    I too am taken with your beautiful words: “sighs are dew which have turned to frost.” A delicately expressed write. Well done.
    Anna :o]

  12. Annell Livingston says:

    My first thought is that pretense is never good…but wait, there will be times it can help. Sometimes we don’t want to spread our inner most thoughts all over the ground, and when you say, “How are you?” My answer will be, “I’m OK.” When clearly I am not…it is just as well. Keep it to yourself, no need to hang out the laundry for all to see, when it is not necessary. Not the right time to share, probably not expected, just a superficial inquiry. Requiring a superficial answer?

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