Not long before he’s caught;
Felt a presence chasing him;
A glimpse before he got;
Alas! the lights went dim.
Taken refuge into a shade,
Gathering breath as he goes;
A sudden duel struck in glade,
Further still, a teardrop flows.
Ashamed for how she fell for lies
Alas! amid a grave of stone,
As love and hope within her dies;
Whispered prayer in muffled tone.
Moonlight creeping over the lawn.
Weeping till the night had gone.
Photo Credits:Β www.deviantart.com
Form: Shakespearean Sonnet
Well played with the story here.. though very sad. I think the end for warriors is often sad.
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I love those closing lines, especially – that internal rhyme in creeping/weeping. Excellent.
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Beautifully written story but so sad.
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Nicely done.
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Thanks. The picture is actually of a stream here that only carries water when there is much rain and the dog is my Ki-Anne, safe and spoiled.
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I love the story that evolved from these end rhymes! Vivid!
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Oh dear, feels like an archetypical love story! Thanks, Sanaa. k.
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Those last two lines are stunning! Good work!
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Oh, this is like a Shakespearian tragedy!
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A Poignant tale … but very well expressed π
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Hello, its a beautiful poem and well written too, although sad and filled with pain and hints of regret, and maybe longing. A silent cry for love to linger…
How are you lately, hope great? Have a nice month ahead and all the best!
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I hope she wipes away the tears and fights back..how hard it is when our hearts and more importantly our trust is broken
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A warrior’s life is hard indeed.
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Quite sad when both love and hope die and one is left to weep through the night! You worked the end words well, Sanaa.
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You have a flair for rhyme so this worked out really well. Great sense of rhythmic flow.
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Well penned. it is sad when the heart is scorned as a result of a lie.
Gracias
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A big narrative in this tight little poem!
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How beautifully you captured the scene with her despair with her lover’s demise.
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A sense of running from what can’t be avoided here, and things closing in.
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Love how you end it.
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poignant but b e a u t i f u l !!
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Last night I went to the Shakespeare theater and saw Much Ado so the talk of duels and love and tears is a very tangible image in my mind.
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Moonlight alone knows what occurred.
A sad tale Sanaa – I hope you add to it.
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A beautiful sonnet with a fantastic closing couplet. Yay!
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Ah yes for every warrior there is a maiden to weep. Dont think this vise versa though
Have a nice Sunday
Much love…
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I like the personification of the moonlight π
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A sad and beautiful poem.
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__Grand and beautiful verse, Sunny! To use some of your words in this haiku echo, the key… is the spelling of morning’s dew :
moonlight seeps
beyond this tearful lawn
mourning’s dew
_m
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A lot of story here! I love the flow and cadences and how you move toward the close–
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Some warriors fight with a heavy heart too. they are also humans. a thoughtful piece Sanaa
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The rhyming couplet at the conclusion of your poem is an indelible close. An awesome write!
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Wow, that was the work of a true word scholar! beautiful and very coherent. profoundly riveting!!!
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Love the last two lines!
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A secret affair caught and broken. The sadness there is almost too much.
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Sad story, but really feel how you penetrated in this adventurous character….~ Also, I think I’d recognize your poem among others…always in style of your own ~ lovely rhymes.
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…took me back in time. I could hear it and see it in my mind. Well done.
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Lovely poem Sanaa. Made me think how much hope goes into a love affair, but the knight in shinning armor may not really save the girl, she has to save herself.
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Awesome! Well done… no. a wonderfully written piece!
ZQ
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The last two lines, especially, were quite sad, and could picture it. Also, made me try the bout rimes, though had linked in another poem to the pantry π thanks…
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I feel so sorry that she feels shame. Chalk it up to a lesson learned and the opportunity for new beginning.
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Good for you! I didn’t even try the end-rhyme poem!
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Inspired, Sanaa ~
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Love the last image… so sharp.
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Sanaa,
A powerful poem which probably reflects life somewhere on a particular day…Very real in its hold..
Eileen
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A story beautifully illustrated with words. the last two lines sum it up perfectly.
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